Friend of Marilyn

Today is International No Diet Day (#INDD) and people around the world are raising awareness of the harms of dieting for the purposes of reduction. Weight loss is a popular pastime for many, and big business for those who profit from the anxiety, fear, and disgust of fatness. It’s estimated that people in the United States spend over $60 billion dollars each year on weight loss. According to a survey in the UK, by the time a woman turns 45, she has been on 61 diets.

I’ve been trying to write this post for a while, and I’ve been struggling with what to say and how to be excited about another 6 May. I guess part of my lack of enthusiasm is because every day is a no diet day for me. I stopped warring with my body almost a decade ago.

My decision to stop engaging with diet culture was influenced by a lot of factors, including the fact that it made me miserable, lowered my self-esteem, resulted in weight gain, and fucked up my relationship with food, exercise, and my body.

So I have rejected the desire to diet (v).

The other reason for my lack of enthusiasm is my belief that every day should be a day we encourage people to disengage with the dieting culture. International No Diet Day began in the UK in 1992, and I appreciate that the purpose is to highlight the problems with dieting.  It is a day for people to reflect on our diet culture; a day to embrace that there is no wrong way to have a body. A day to acknowledge that we are weight obsessed, and this leads to fat hate, fat shame, and weight discrimination.

But why can’t every day be a day like that? Why do we encourage women to accept their bodies in one breath, but then promote weight loss in the next? Why do we say out loud that we know that diets don’t work, but then hope secretly at home that this next lifestyle change will?

I am surrounded by smart, funny, delightful, people who engage with the diet culture every single day. They worry about how many calories they are consuming. They limit the pleasure they allow themselves to find in food. They contort and twist logic and numbers to feel less guilty about the health behaviors they engage in. They agonize over planning a day free from temptations and possible pitfalls. They talk about points. A lot. They go back and forth between being unhappy with their perpetual state of starvation and lack of satisfaction, and finding pride in denying themselves a life of fulfillment and satiation.

Many may be unwilling to walk away from diet culture because they believe their lives would be better if they were able to lose weight and keep it off permanently. And they’re not put off that weight loss has such a small success rate. It’s aspirational, right? To want to be part of the 5% of people who are able to maintain a weight loss of more than 10 kilos (20lbs) over 5 years?

But if you’re one of those who are ready to quit the war – the war with your body, the war with your food, the war with your very sanity – I’ve gathered some materials that you may find helpful.

Start by reading Golda Poretsky’s great material on walking away from dieting culture.  My favourite is her article on how to break-up with your diet. She explains that breaking up with dieting culture is just like any other break-up. You have to accept that it’s not you, it’s them (your diet). And that you may be tempted to get back together with that ex just one more time.

Kate Harding has written about the reasons that people are resistant to the message of fat acceptance, and how pervasive the magical thinking of thinness is. Her piece on the fantasy of being thin changed the way I thought about my own body and self-acceptance journey.

Lastly, check out the blog “you’re welcome”, and the great posts about fatness, fat positivity, fat phobia, etc. I especially enjoy Lunette’s piece on being fat positive – it was partly what inspired me to begin my own blog with a declaration.

For me, every day is a no diet day.  What about you – are you ready to make that change?

Samoa Air has announced a new ‘pay what you weigh’ policy that will determine ticket prices for passengers based on their combined body and luggage weight. The chief executive, Mr Langton, claims this is the fairest way to determine pricing because, ‘a kilo is a kilo’. Regardless of what Mr Langton says, treating customers differently based on weight is sizeism, plain and simple.

Charging fat people more to fly will result in fewer fat people flying. The fat person who needs to travel for work may lose their job, or chance at promotion, because the company does not want to have to pay more for them to travel. The fat adult whose parent is dying may not be able to make it to their deathbed. The fat person who needs to travel for life saving medical care may miss out on that treatment. Dying? Sorry, you’re too fat to fly. This will do wonders for the tourism industry in Samoa, I’d imagine. Fewer fat people visiting – fewer people bringing home gifts to family and friends.

People aren’t cargo – we aren’t mail. We are people. We deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. And we aren’t luggage. An individual can choose to pack or not pack anything they want –but I cannot choose to leave parts of my fat body at home.

Some fat people have always dreaded air travel. Squishing their bodies into seats that are too small; pushing themselves against the wall of the plane as to not inconvenience anyone else with their body (Ewww! Mom! The fat is touching me – GROSS!) I used to love to fly; I loved the quiet time to myself without distraction, the solace I found while soaring above the clouds – until airlines started kicking fatties off planes. The issue of flying while fat was brought into the forefront a few years ago when celebrity Kevin Smith (Director of Clerks, Mallrats, and Chasing Amy) was booted off of a plane because he was fat.

Arguments made by airlines in the past with regards to fat customers have been about comfort and safety. Treating fat customers differently because of their weight, they said, is about the comfort of all customers (because it’s more comfortable for my seatmate if I paid the airline more to fly; or, sitting across two seats is comfortable? In what world?) Or it’s about the safety of everyone on board.

The comfort argument is silly, really. Airplanes are giant buses in the sky – public transportation is rarely about comfort. And as many stories of flying fatties online can attest, the comfort that seems to be at issue is that of non-fat customers. Airlines seem to care little about asking fat people to cram into their seats – but if it makes someone else on the flight uncomfortable, it’s a problem. And, of course, there are many other ways that a person’s comfort may be disturbed in the sky – the screaming baby, the child kicking at your seat from behind, the person who leaves their seatback reclined for the entire trip, the middle aged businessman who has no regard for anyone but himself. No mention, however, is ever made about discriminating against these people.

The other issue cited is safety – fat people are not allowed to sit in the emergency exit rows of many planes because it is believed that our girth (or seatbelt extender) will somehow limit our ability to get out of our seat or open the emergency door or help others out the door. This is probably a conflation of weight with health & fitness.

Some airlines have worked to address comfort & safety by requiring fat people to purchase two seats. Of course, many fat people who have taken this option find that this is difficult to do online (as you may not buy two tickets using the same name), that customer service reps often do not how to check you in on both tickets, and that when you get on the plane, those two seats that you bought may not be next to each other. Others have been forced to give up that extra seat if the flight is overbooked. You know what that tells us? That requiring fatties to buy a second seat isn’t about comfort. It isn’t about safety.

It’s about discrimination against fat people. And it’s punitive: plain and simple.

Of course, many people embrace punitive measures against fat people. They figure that fat people have only themselves to blame for their fatness, so why should it be bothersome if they face discrimination? It’s the consequence they face for being fat – for failing to take better care of themselves. As Lesley Kinzel explains,

“Airplane seats are small, and trust me when I say that the fat stranger is as miserable than you are, if not moreso, as [they] has not only been forced into a situation in which [they] must be physically uncomfortable, but in which [they] also may be publicly humiliated at any time. Certainly some people would argue that fat folks deserve to be publicly humiliated simply by virtue of being fat, but those people are assholes.”

For fatties who do fly, great tips may be found all over the Fat-o-sphere. For example, when possible, fly on a Canadian airline – the Canadian Transportation Agency has ruled that it is illegal for Canadian airlines to charge more for fat travellers, or require them to purchase an additional seat. They ruled that policies must be ‘One person, one fare’. Another great tip for fat flyers is to use Seat Guru to assess the size of different seats on different planes (because yes, even on the same plane, seats often measure differently).

Blogger Ragen Chastain has come up with a list of possible solutions to accommodate both airlines, and passengers of all sizes. One obvious solution is to make seats on the plane bigger, which the new Airbus model is doing. Why is it unreasonable to expect airlines, and other modes of transportation, to offer accommodation for bodies of all sizes? Why is it unreasonable to suggest that the amount of space you are supposed to take up is the amount of space you take up with your body?

Of course, there is a larger social justice argument to be made – a ‘pay what you weigh’ policy will disproportionately affect women, the poor, and ethnic minorities – all groups who are more likely to be fat. And all groups who are already disadvantaged in our society.

In this system, people estimate how many kilos they need to pay for when they book their ticket. And are weighed before they board their flight, in order to ensure that they paid the correct amount. I’m wondering what happens when there is a discrepancy? If I weigh more when I fly, maybe I’m now pregnant; I’ll have to pay more before I get on my flight? Is the reverse also true? If I’ve lost weight, because I had a leg amputated, will I be given some of my money back?

Samoa Air wants you to believe that this new policy is fair and awesome – and puts you in control! From their website, “with Samoa Air, you are the master of how much (or little!) your air ticket will cost.” Sure, if you believe that people are in control of how much they weigh. (As lots of people do, even without evidence to support this.)

“People generally are becoming much more weight conscious,” chief executive Langton said. “That’s a health issue in some areas. It has raised the awareness of weight.” Because fat people don’t know their fat until they’re told that they’re too fat to fly?! And Langton is falling victim to a common obesity fallacy here – that someone’s weight/body size tells you something about their health status or health behaviours. I hope he doesn’t honestly believe that his discriminatory practice will have any effect on people’s health behaviours, much less their body size.

Luckily, this is the first airline to engage in such a practice.

“It’s a new concept,” Langton admitted. “As any airline operators knows, airlines don’t run on seats, they run on weight. People generally are bigger, wider and taller than they were 50 years ago. It is an area where the industry will start looking at this.”

So he acknowledges that people are bigger than they were 50 years ago – and yet his airline has not done anything to ensure that they are able to accommodate the new normal body. He has said that this new policy will allow his airline to accommodate bodies of different sizes, based on who has purchased tickets for each flight. This means larger seats for fat individuals, more pitch room for tall individuals, etc. Which isn’t an awful idea – if it indeed comes to fruition. If the policy of Samoa Air is really about fairness, then they will ensure that they are able to accommodate a range of bodies comfortably on their airplane. And if I’m paying more to travel the same distance as my skinnier friend, then my fat ass wants a seat I can comfortably fit into.

Update (Sharing the work of others who have written about Samoa Air):

Tallulah Spunkhead at The Lady Garden, Pay As You Weigh(t, what??)

Ragen Chastain at Danceswithfat, Airline’s Pay by the Pound Policy is a Problem

Jay Solomon at More of Me to Love, 5 Reasons We Can’t Charge Fat People More to Fly

Special issue of Fat Studies: An Interdisciplinary Journal of Body Weight and Society on Intersections, guest edited by Cat Pausé, PhD

This special issue of Fat Studies: An Interdisciplinary Journal of Body Weight and Society will engage with the issue of intersectionality.  As an interdisciplinary field, Fat Studies represents an intersection for many academics: a blending of the home discipline with the theoretical and methodological frameworks of Fat Studies. This intersection provides richness, but also possible tension.

The concept of intersectionality usually refers to the study of the interaction, or intersection, of multiple systems of oppression and/or discrimination.  From Kimberelé Crenshaw’s first theoretical use to Flavia Dzodan’s more recent declaration – the issue of intersectionality is acknowledged within feminist circles as an important tenant of scholarship, pedagogy, and activism. The recognition of intersectionality within Fat Studies is especially poignant, as fatness interacts with gender, class, race, orientation, etc in both overt and covert manners.

This special issue invites papers that address the concept of intersectionality. Potential topics might include, but are not limited to:

•             Intersections between Fat Studies and other academic disciplines

•             Intersectional analysis of issues related to fat, fat identity, and fat embodiment

•             Fat activism as intersection

•             Useful methodologies for intersectionality in Fat Studies scholarship

•             Theoretical frameworks related to Fat Studies intersectionality and interdisciplinary work

•             Critical reflections on intersectionality within Fat Studies

To submit a proposal for inclusion in this special issue of the journal, please send a 250-500 word summary of your article as well as a current CV to Cat Pausé, at c.pause@massey.ac.nz by May 1, 2013. Scholarly work from those outside of academia is welcome. Any questions about the special issue can be directed to this email address as well.

Final submissions should be between 3,000 and 6,000 words, including all notes and references.  Full manuscripts will be required in August, 2013. If you wish to include reproductions of visual images with your essay, you will need to receive permission to do so from the artists/ copyright holders of the image(s). All authors will need to sign a form that transfers copyright of their article to the publisher, Taylor & Francis/ Routledge.

Fat Studies is the first academic journal in the field of scholarship that critically examines theory, research, practices, and programs related to body weight and appearance. Content includes original research and overviews exploring the intersection of gender, race/ethnicity, sexuality, age, ability, and socioeconomic status. Articles critically examine representations of fat in health and medical sciences, the Health at Every Size model, the pharmaceutical industry, psychology, sociology, cultural studies, legal issues, literature, pedagogy, art, theater, popular culture, media studies, and activism.

Fat Studies is an interdisciplinary, international field of scholarship that critically examines societal attitudes and practices about body weight and appearance. Fat Studies advocates equality for all people regardless of body size. It explores the way fat people are oppressed, the reasons why, who benefits from that oppression and how to liberate fat people from oppression. Fat Studies seeks to challenge and remove the negative associations that society has about fat and the fat body. It regards weight, like height, as a human characteristic that varies widely across any population. Fat Studies is similar to academic disciplines that focus on race, ethnicity, gender, or age.

Have you ever had a stranger yell at you as you walked down the street? Or “Moo” as they drove past? How about a group of people point and laugh at you as you sit on a park bench, reading a book? Ever had your meal interrupted by someone you don’t know telling you that you shouldn’t be eating ‘that’?

Public harassment is a regular occurrence for many fat people. This shouldn’t be surprising. We live in a fat phobic culture, where we are regularly warned about the dangers and costs of the obesity epidemic (read: fat people). Scare mongering is ever present. We are surrounded by images of fat people without heads – further reinforcing that fat people are less than human, and therefore unworthy of respect or dignity.

Fat people are harassed for a variety of reasons. For eating in public; moving our bodies on the street or in the gym; decorating our bodies in interesting and delightful ways.

The purpose of street harassment is to remind us fatties that we are not supposed to be living our lives. We are not supposed to subject others to our fat bodies. We are most certainly not supposed to be having fun. We are not supposed to be happy. How dare we parade our fat bodies around in public, in fun clothes and a smile, no less? Don’t we know we should be ashamed? Don’t we know that our bodies are disgusting?

My friend Kath Read, of the Fat Heffalump, has written a lot about the street harassment she experiences. In her most recent piece, she explores possible explanations others have proposed to explain the harassment away – and she unpacks them all with her usual brilliance. She also shares some pictorial evidence of the kind of harassment she receives in public.

I’ve only experienced blatant street harassment once. It was a beautiful summer day as I was walking down the street in a group. As we passed by a man moving in the other direction, he turned around and yelled, ‘Hey fat fuck!’ We all just kept walking, as my companions tried to pretend they didn’t hear it, and I burned quietly in shame. (Because I did something wrong by simply existing?!) I didn’t respond, and to say it ruined my day is an understatement. I’d like to think that my reaction today would be very different.

I have friends who do respond, and they find that the harasser tries to flip the blame – ‘Woah, hey; calm down, lady! Geez…’ – making them seem like the asshat. Substantia Jones, of the Adipositivity Project, has begun a Tumblr called ‘Smile, Sizeist’. It allows individuals who experience public harassment to take a photo of their harasser and post it online for the world to see. As noted on the blog,

“Next time someone’s a dick to you about your size, raise your most powerful weapons. Your voice and your camera.”

I think one of the reasons that I don’t receive more harassment is that I am able, in many ways, to blend in. While I am always the fattest person around, I dress conservatively; not drawing additional attention to my body (this is not to imply, in any way, that those who do draw attention are somehow responsible for the harassment they receive, because they are not). It is something I am aware of when I dress, especially when I wear something a bit more adventurous.

For example, I have been lucky enough to have some custom designed pieces from I Love Lissy (a great fatshion line here in NZ). It took me months to garner the courage to wear one out in public. It’s a dress (something I rarely wear) that shows off my legs (something I never do) and draws attention (something I have shied away from with my clothing choices). I’ve now worn it three times, and each time I mentally prepare myself for street harassment. It’s become part of my ‘getting ready’ routine when I select certain clothes, or accessories. Just the other night, I decided to wear it out to a function in town. I knew I would be walking through heavily populated areas of town, and it crossed my mind, ‘What if someone says something? What do I say in response?’

Me in my I Love Lissy dress

Haley Morris-Cafiero has been documenting the way people look at her in public – she has posted the photos in a series called ‘Wait Watchers’ on her website. She notes that her project allows her to shift/reverse the gaze; while performing everyday tasks and taking their photos, she provides another perspective when considering street harassment.

When fat people talk about street harassment, we are not looking for your pity. We don’t want you to feel sorry for us, or to exclaim how absolutely awful it is. We want you to acknowledge that this is the fat shaming culture we all live in. And that you are most likely a participant in the hostility we experience every day.

You may not yell at us as we walk down the street, or ‘moo’ or ‘pig snort’ in our faces, but do you participate in other ways? Do you think hateful things when you see us enjoying ourselves? Do you make snarky comments to your friends when you see us eating in public?  Have you ever thought, ‘She is too fat to be wearing that’, or ‘Well, he obviously shouldn’t be eating that’?

You may not be openly harassing us in public, but you are contributing to the fat shaming world we all live in. If you want to be our ally, be aware of how you respond to others – be conscious of your thoughts. And the ways they reinforce our fat phobic world. When you think something negative about a fat person you see on the street, imagine if you would want someone to think that of your fat friend, or fat aunt, or fat partner, or of you?

Try adopting the fantastic Underpants Rule, as outlined by Ragen Chastain, of Danceswithfat.

“The Underpants Rule is simple: everyone is the boss of their own underpants so you get to choose for you and other people get to choose from them and it’s not your job to tell other people what to do.”

I usually shorten this to, ‘If it’s not my body, it’s not my business.’ Full stop.

Or, how about other adapting another standard, ‘If you can’t think or say anything nice, don’t think or say anything at all’.

If you’re thinking, I can’t control my internal reactions to what I see – you’re wrong. You were not born with beliefs and attitudes about fat people; you learned them.  And you can learn new ways too – new ways to think about fat bodies. New ways to appreciate all bodies belonging to others, as well as your own.

I will surround myself with positive representations of fat bodies (e.g., The Adipositivity Project, fat positive Tumblrs).

I will not watch movies and televisions show that cash in on fat hate. This means no ‘Biggest Loser’, no ‘Embarassing Fat Bodies’, no ‘Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition’, and no ‘Glee’.

I will wear clothes that make me feel good about myself, my identity, and my body.

I will not sit quietly while those around me in engage in fat phobic conversations.

I will seek out spaces – or create them – that are safe and celebratory of fat bodies.

I will hide friends on Facebook who post fat hate or fat shaming material on their wall.

I will appreciate & promote the work of fat activists who inspire me (e.g., Kath Read, Ragen Chastain,Red No3, Lesley Kinzel).

I will unfollow those who tweet anti-fat, pro-weight loss, or body shaming, material.

I will not think or say hateful things about my body and its capabilities.

I will work to ignore those who tell me that I’m taking up too much space in this world to be worthy.

Welcome to another holiday season! As many of us rush out to buy gifts (do people still do this?), or take to the interwebs for that perfect present for that special someone, I’ve compiled a list of great fatlicious gifts!

For the Fatshionista

The petticoat from Domino Dollhouse

The Muumuu from I Love Lissy

For the Planner

The 2013 calendar from The Adipositivity Project

For the Friend who LOVED ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’

Fat sex: The naked truth by Rebecca Jane Weinstein

Hot & heavy: Fierce fat girls on life, love & fashion by Virgie Tovar (Ed)

For the Bookworm

Coal to diamonds: A memoir by Beth Ditto

For the DYIer

Make It Work: A DIY fat positive craft/fatshion zine from Fatty Unbound

For the Collector

A print from Fancy Lady Industries

For the Activist

I <3 fat chicks T-shirt from FatGuyShirts

Fat-Tastic Zine Pack by Sage

And Just For Fun!

Travel size Fatty Patty doll from Pipedream

Working as a fat activist means you are often the sole voice in a space suggesting that being fat is not the worst thing in the world. You are criticized regularly for your insistence that the relationship between weight and health is more complex than most people understand. You are patronized when you suggest that fat people are the best individuals to share what a lived fat experience is like (rather than, say, a thin person wearing a fat suit). And you deal daily with concern trolls,

“Of course people shouldn’t be discriminated against based on their body size, but ….. [fill in your favourite concern troll justification here]”.

It doesn’t help matters that the media, including the news media (whose job it is to inform), engage in untruths and omissions around fatness. Putting aside the other egregious errors they make when reporting on issues of body size (headless fatties, only presenting one side of the story), the biggest disservices they do are the untruths and omissions present in most pieces about body size.

For example, in most stories about obesity/weight/fatness in New Zealand, it is reported that New Zealand is the third fattest country in the world (behind the United States of America and Australia). This is not true. According to data on obesity from the World Health Organisation, New Zealand does not make the top 20 (of the 193 countries with reported data). New Zealand does happen to be the third fattest country in the OECD (a consortium of 30 economically developed countries) – and while some may argue that those countries are the only countries that matter, it doesn’t change the fact that it is untrue when a news outlet reports that NZ is the third fattest country in the world.

When the Fat Studies: Reflective Intersections conference was featured on the cover of the Dominion Post in July, the story contained the incorrect statement that NZ is the third fattest country in the world. When I followed up with the reporter, I was told that they had pulled the evidence for the statement from a previous story published in the paper, but took my point. So, because an earlier piece in the Dom Post had claimed NZ to be the third fattest in the world, then that was enough evidence to claim it again.

I did not see a correction run on the error– and the Dominion Post continues to embrace this untruth.

A colleague of mine recently expressed his own dismay over this phenomenon. Andrew had recently been interviewed for a story about the size of airplane seats, and had corrected the reporter when he (Matt Stewart of the Dominion Post) incorrectly remarked that NZ was the third fattest country in the world. Even after he was corrected, the piece ran with the false information. Andrew sent him a follow-up email (as shared in the blog piece, ‘More media porkies’), but as you can see – the piece has not been updated to reflect the false statement.

And the cycle continues…

Perhaps the most damage done by the news media on this topic is their refusal to accurately present the evidence on weight loss or engage with the evidence at all. Empirical data has shown weight loss attempts – whether through diet, exercise, lifestyle change, etc – to fail in 95% of individuals. Almost all individuals who attempt to lose weight are unable to achieve a meaningful (more than 10 kilos) and permanent (longer than 5 years) reduction in weight. And yet, this is rarely included in any story you see about obesity, fatness, dieting, etc. When was the last time you read a piece where weight loss was part of the story – and the 5% success rate was included? This glaring omission reinforces the belief that fat people could stop being fat if they simply tried hard enough. It reinforces the indignation of those with anti-fat attitudes, and the shame of those who have failed to reduce their body weight.

I am not suggesting that the news media are solely responsible for the hysteria that surrounds the obesity rhetoric in our world. And I am not suggesting that it is the news media’s responsibility to educate people on the very complex nature between our weight and our health; on the relationship between our bodies and our lived experiences; on the problematic nature of suggesting that people have a moral obligation to be healthy.

I am suggesting that the standard for evidence be more than whether it has been published or used before by the same media. I am suggesting that the news media has an obligation to recognize their own bias and fat hatred, and how this shapes the pieces they produce. And I am suggesting that they have an obligation to do more than simply reinforce the status quo, without asking critical questions or allowing for multiple perspectives to be included in their presentation of the story. We could move the conversation around fatness and body size leaps and bounds if the news media would stop with the untruths and omissions.